an grown man, some wrinkles, it looks like his nose is crooked from being broken so many times, has some grey in his hair, he needs to shave, he looks exhausted, he’s barely hiding his spiderman suit because he just can’t be bothered, and he is in love with a burger that he can’t pay for because he is a broke mess. i can only imagine that what’s going through miles head looking at the man above is “this disaster has been saving the city on a daily basis???”
now THIS is deadpool’s boyfriend folks!! this right here, the adult wreck of a man, Peter Parker, is the man Deadpool loves. I better be seeing ship art of this Spidey with Deadpool, and nO MORE P*DO SHIT
peter: i hate it when people say that i can “do whatever a spider can”
tony: well, can’t you?
peter: i can think of many things a spider can do that i can’t. i can’t crawl into someone’s ear and die, i can’t legally leave guatemala without a passport, i can’t have sex with a spider —
I’m still amazed that it’s been literally ten years since the story where Spider-Man made a deal with the devil that dramatically altered not only his life but that of the entire Marvel universe and that was just like never followed up on ever like how do you do that
Iron Man has had multiple stories in a row meant to fix the ones that came before and completely derailed his character, Carol Danvers had a story back when she was barely a B-lister that attempted to undo the damage from the Marcus storyline, Captain America is currently in the process of trying to repair the PR disaster that was Secret Empire, and the X-Men have been subject to so many retcons it’s basically historical revisionism at this point, but Spider-Man, Marvel’s single most profitable and successful franchise of all time, still hasn’t even tried to touch One More Day, the most unanimously-accepted low point in his history, and he and MJ are still broken up because they sold their marriage to the devil
I’d like at least one writer to acknowledge (if they haven’t already) just how weird it is that Mephisto wanted their MARRIAGE. Like…that’s not a thing devil figures normally ask for.
There was a Deadpool comic where he offhandedly mentioned to a confused post-OMD Spider-Man “At least I didn’t need to make a deal with the devil to get a decent supporting cast.”
hey hi um *taps mic* peter parker isn’t up for adoption he’s got a blood relative as his guardian who loves and cherishes him and is doing a fantastic job raising him already and her name is may parker thanks for coming to my ted talk
I keep thinking how much more powerful the Spiderman origin story would be if Peter Parker was an African American kid, whose Uncle Ben was shot by police while being arrested for a minor parking infraction. There is no formal investigation, and Peter decides to put himself on the line to prevent it happening again. He tackles the white crimes that go unpunished, punishes POC criminals fairly. He is the leveler, always fighting to be without bias, to be just. To protect people like his uncle.
This not only mirrors so much of what’s happening in America, but feeds right into the complex relationship between Spiderman, the authorities and the media.
Peter Parker is a brilliant student, awkward, a nerd, but is branded a thug, a gang member, a criminal, because of his appearance. The media latch on to that and misrepresent him totally.
The police, humilitated by the fact that he refuses to work with them and often punishes cops themselves for brutalizing innocent people, or guilty people who still deserve better treatment than they get, attempt to hunt him down.
I had to.
oh man. This is the shit.
The “with great power comes great responsibility” line gets such a deeper meaning within this context.
Not to mention a white nerdy boy with glasses is not the look of a social outcast or person of ridicule anymore.
Spider-Man (Peter Parker) has to deal with the awkwardness of teaching the class of Avengers Academy students as a substitute teacher.
– Amazing Spider-Man v1 #661, 2011
Remember kids, spider-man is awesome. But peter parker is an idiot. Thats why i was so disappointed that the superior spider-man ended.
“Kids. Listen, you make good points, but let me put it this way. I’ve seen some shit. When one of my enemies found out who I was, he dropped my girlfriend off a bridge. By the way, lesson 3, once someone’s free-falling suddenly catching them makes for a loud snap if you can’t slow them down before stopping them.
That Avengers protection? Yeah, good luck with that when the Red Skull is in charge of the program. He was calling himself Dell Rusk. Can you believe that? The Red Skull got a high ranking position in the US government using an anagram alias. Also, you won’t remember this because the timeline was rewritten, but I’ve seen how good Avengers protection is when it comes to loved ones. Lesson four, steer clear of Mephisto, just in general.
Whole celebrity superhero thing, maybe reconsider that. Didn’t work out great for the New Warriors, even though like, that didn’t make any sense. I mean, Nitro was the dude to killed Captain Marvel. No, not her, the first one. He got cancer from saving people from nerve gas. Everyone cried. Especially me. Anyhow, why did everyone blame Speedball-et-all when a drugged up superhuman terrorist who killed one of our most beloved heroes (how do you kids not know who he is?) did the actual damage? Where was I…
The government! Fun fact. You know, I’ve talked to Reed Richards, and in most universes, Richard Nixon was impeached for something called the Watergate scandal, something about wiretapping and political adversaries, and not for donning the serpent crown and trying to usher in a nightmare apocalypse under the rule of Set, the demon-god of serpents.
And that leads us to lesson I’ve-lost-track, most of your heroes that are in their 30s and 40s have lived through massive trauma, and are aware of at least two person-replacing shape-shifting alien races (the better of the two doesn’t shove an acid-barbed tongue into your brain to consume your very being, by the way) so maybe nod along when the oldies go ranting about secret identities.
Oh yeah, and be skeptical of too-good-to-be-true outfits that come out of alien machines.”
Cheloneuniverse 