never seen awful statues?? I think u are forgetting all of Michelangelo’s attempts at sculpting women, the big queer
Damn, how could I forget?
Dented oranges are my favorite type of breast
Michel-I’ve never seen a naked woman-angelo
he literally just sculpted a man’s pectorals and put lumpy lemons on them
Okay to be fair, there are a shitton of Virgin Mary paintings that show Mickey wasn’t the only dude out there doing religious art who hadn’t a fucking clue what breasts were supposed to be.
Madonna Nursing the Christ Child, Robert Champin’s (c. 1375 – 26 April 1444) workshop. Tiny shoulderboobs will be a theme here, as will babies who look like they want to start a fight.
Madonna With Child, Rogier van der Weyden, c.1450. Please note that we have both tiny boob and an invisible nipple.
Mary and Child, Gerard David (1490). Even the baby isn’t buying it.
Madonna Nursing the Christ Child, Legend of the Master of the Magdalen (15th-16th century)
Galaktotrophousa, Master Ioannis (1778). Yes, there’s a boob in this picture.
And my favorite, for bonus points of “why is this even a thing”:
The Miraculous Lactation of St. Bernard, Alonso Cano (1650)
This painting depicts the spiritual nourishing of St. Bernard by the milk of Our Lady, based on this legendary mystical experience: Bernard prayed before a statue of the Madonna, asking her, “Show yourself a mother” (“Monstra te esse Matrem”). The statue came to life and and squirted milk from the breast onto the Saint’s lips.
So yeah, Michelangelo couldn’t sculpt a boob to save his goddamn life, but if he was cribbing off of other artists, he can be forgiven. At least one of them might have seen a boob and still fucked up this bad.
#even today male artists don’t know how boobs work
My friend’s tag brings up a fantastic point and I’d like to expand on it:
These remind me of that project where they asked people to draw a bicycle from memory. Except it doesn’t look like these people had ever seen a boob to draw from memory.
it’s facial reconstructions of prehistoric humans!!
like, look at this part-homo sapiens, part-neandertal man from well over 30,000 years ago:
doesn’t he just look like a dude you’d wanna hang out with? like he probably washes dishes in the kitchen with you, and has excellent weed
what a charming fellow. what stories he probably has to tell. i’d definitely go shoot the shit with him on Contemplation Rock after i’d finished my day’s work carving a bone flute for the autumn hunting ceremony, or whatever
people have been people ever since people first became people, i tell you what
they all had lives and histories and families and friends and dumb gossip and games they played and total bullshit in which they believed wholeheartedly
they all argued about the nature of the world, and of themselves
they all sang songs
they all drew pictures
they all buried their dead in graves, and they buried their dead in graves well before they did a lot of that other stuff. they buried their dead with flowers, with panther claws, with the bones of animals they’d killed, with the bones of family members who had died at the same time or earlier. they buried their dead with their arms folded across their chests
they fell in love
they took care of their old and their sick and their disabled, even when it cost them
they made new things, and worried about what the new things meant for people everywhere, as a whole
Oh I like him he looks like he would appreciate my jokes
This dude would have great stories at a get-together and would bring some really great homemade dip.
I feel like he really digs Lo-Fi Music
This guy was sculpted by Alfons and Adrie Kennis, and their Neanderthal reconstructions are all delightful.
I love the kid in the last picture a lot- they look like a kid, just a little kid who’s done some mischief and is trying not to laugh about it.
I also adore their Lucy- they’ve struck a wonderful balance between the falling angel and the rising ape.
And their Turkana boy- there’s something precious and wistful in those eyes.
But my favorite has got to be their reconstruction of H. floresiensis.
Just look at her. That’s a face of someone who’s lived and seen a lot, but also a face that’s known love and joy and laughter. That’s a face with a soul.
Thank you so much!! I appreciate that a lot, since drawing and everything reading/writing are something that I love very much. I’m happy you think I am good at them both!
I coloured an old sketch I had lying around, as a thanks for all the lovely comments you left on my fics (the t-shirts are a reference to this picture)
Thank you so much! I’ve been blessed… I’m really glad you like my ShinDeku drawings. Drawing them and writing them makes me really happy, so I enjoy sharing them a lot. As I’m sure everybody knows, I turn every ShinDeku related ask to an excuse to draw some. It’s been pretty cold in Chile lately, so I dressed them very cozy.
Cheloneuniverse 
