Agatha/Gil, arranged marriage and mutual pining please? <3

asukaskerian:

tbh i would CHEAT LIKE A MOFO and make it ot3 instead.

1. Gil and Agatha meet in Beetleburg at university after Gil was kicked out of Paris. Agatha knows she’s the Heterodyne – Punch and Judy told her when she turned 18. She doesn’t tell Gil Holzfaller, though she does tell him she has a secret identity after he emos because he has a secret identity and yes, Gil, I don’t care you’re Teufel’s son, If You Knew My Family. At least your dude’s band of hardened criminals was disbanded. :((((

2. Agatha leaves U, claims her title, surprises everyone – they turn around and she’s already in total control, whoops – and now politics have to include her as an equal participant, not as someone you try an army on as a first reaction. but armies are very much still a possibility le gasp.

3. Gil is maneuvered into marrying Anevka to stabilize the Wulfenbach rule, while Agatha is maneuvered into marrying Tarvek. (that’s grandma’s plan tbh.) (also since Agatha showed up Aaronev knew where the Holy CHild was and that she was alive and all, and was less tempted to put his old mistress into his daughter’s body. eeegh.)

3a. Agatha hasn’t even met Tarvek yet. (or like, any sturmvarious, so people are trying to talk her into choosing Tweedle or fukken cousin Leopold.) She’s very sad she can’t kidnap-and-marry Gil Teufel but oh lawd would this freak out the whole continent. Sad sigh of sadness But I Will Soldier On.
3b. meanwhile Gil always knew he was gonna have to sacrifice for the empire but DAMN IT FATHER WHY DON’T YOU MARRY A STURMv… oraus what do you mean my mom is still alive and they don’t practice polygamy. Ha Ha “polyandry yes” MARRY A DUDE THEN asjkgjgh why meeee sobs.

4a. Gil finds Anevka fucking terrifying and creepy and he thinks if he’s married to her he will NEVER have peace she will have tried to assassinate him seven time by their first anniversary, he can tell. but Seffie is… not a spark and sorry Seffie he has to deny her, he’d be BORED sorry sorry he still prefers Anevka. .___. if he manages to outwit her he’ll be sharper AND more respected right?? Gotta be Anevka. She has the better claim, too.
4b. Agatha finds Tarvek agreeable, flattering and spineless, Tweedle insufferably boorish and presumptuous, and Leopold entirely forgettable. Then she walks into them trying to kill each other and oh hey Tarvek is not as spineless as he seemed, huh. Tricky boy.

5. … Aaronev like HEY WHO CARES ABOUT MARRYING OUR WAY BACK INTO A DE FACTO RULE I WANT MY LUCREZIA BACK *NOW*
It’s a total fucking mess. Tarvek and Anevka help Agatha out because they MUCH prefer the non-Other solution to the empire thing and also fuck you dad. Gil and Klaus join up with an army, it turns into several days of bloodbath trying to contain the town’s revenants and Geisters, etc etc.

Gil and Agatha recognize each other as Gil and Klaus finally break through into the castle to find her trying to comfort Tarvek as he cradles the body of his sister.

6. O ShIt O nO.

7. Agatha and Gil put aside their noes to help Tarvek take a print of his sister’s damaged brain readings so he can try an imprint (like madame desmana in paris! all he’s got left sobsobs.) then mourning while working ensues. gil is torn because he didn’t leave paris and tarvek in friendship and now dude’s stealing his gf but his sister just fukken died, and agatha is torn because gil you’re WHO but ahhwgh fiancé i was starting to like all vulnerable and furiously desperate and bared open by grief which she could tell, like, neve happens, and that pings her in the feels something awful.

8. anyway the anevka copy is mostly a success but she’s still not even a direct copy, she’s a post-mortem partial download and being a clank now she is SUPER not suitable to marry Gil.

but Gil already went through his options and he is NOT MARRYING SEFFIE.

no he’s not marrying that random cousin who’s even farther down the line of sucession either that is pointless. he would marry violetta though – can’t? why the fuck not, he could WORK with violetta, just recognize her and… ok ok FINE. anyway he’s very hurt/confused/lonely/sad over Agatha still being poised to marry tarvek (tho he’s oddly glad tarvek won’t be alone)

…okay fine he might marry seffie after all…

9. agatha: hey what was that you said about your mom and polyandry what a grand idea LET’S BOTH MARRY TARVEK. :3c

anyway the whole continent bitches at them that this CANNOT HAPPEN omg???? but once they get stuck on that solution they’re like IT’S THAT OR NOTHING BITCHES and eventually the valoises and associates give in, bitching all the while, because the power of the storm king will be falling even faster back into their family’s hands, they would have had to like, marry gil/anevka and agatha/tarvek’s kids to each other a generation or two down. it’s super shocking and risqué and they Don’t Approve of the impropriety aspect at ALL but since when have they placed that against potential power, i will ask you.

Anyway Tarvek ends up their husband indeed but he has almost no legal power over each of their dominions. he’s a figurehead/advisor. it satisfies everyone inside the marriage and no one outside of it. XD