quirkify:

my tags from that last bakugo post  by @lesbian-ochako (it’s a damn good post) + some added stuff because i have thoughts on this, as a survivor and as someone who is mentally ill:

bakugo definitely needs. therapy in general like. he just. kid needs genuine psychological help. he’s HEAVY coded as having NPD, for one (which is NOT to say that people with NPD are inherently abusive, nor is it to say that it is to blame for his abusive behavior. the two things are mutually exclusive. my abuser has NPD but his NPD didn’t make him abuse me. i have a cluster B as well – because i was abused. PDs are highly exacerbated by outside circumstance, i can expand on this if asked.)

bakugo has literally no idea that how his mom raised him was abusive. it’s just how it was for him, and he unfortunately falls into the (very small) percentage of abuse victims who parrot and pass along what’s done and said to them. he literally doesn’t even classify it as abuse, which already says a lot about how badly it warped his sense of judgment.

there’s a LOT to unpack there and i seriously wish his backstory wasn’t played for laughs. he needs to get through THAT shit and understand that part of his life and his psyche in order to properly tackle the ROOT of his anger issues and kill them like a weed. to not only recognize what he’s been doing all his life but ALL of the different components that contributed to shaping him. he has to understand in order to stop. and he needs to stop.

his behavior is a hydra: you can’t just chop off the heads, more will grow back. you have to kill the entire creature right from the heart. you can’t just treat symptoms, you have to treat the whole condition. 

you can’t just tell him to stop doing individual things as they happen – he has to understand how his own mind works, why it works that way, and then maybe he’ll see just how deep it all runs. because it runs pretty deep.

it all ties together and it’s a big gnarled nasty horrible mess and HE is a mess and he needs to. realize these things. just like he needs to face consequences for his actions in general he needs to actually experience Consequences in order to learn. consequences and the truth. it’s not just about realizing what was done to him by his mother and how the praise from everyone else combined with her treatment distorted his thinking. it’s still about recognizing the mistakes and bad choices he made all on his own. all of it. every piece.

and then after all this he honestly needs to just get Away from izuku like. izuku keeps making the conscious decision to keep being near him + still prioritizes his well being when he doesn’t have to and that’s izuku’s choice to make. he’s allowed to make it, even if it’s not wise or healthy. but in the long term the best thing that can be done in terms of healing is separation, honestly. it’s hard when they’re still in school because they’re in the same class but as they grow up they need to part ways.

izuku needs to heal from this shit Away from bakugo and bakugo needs to. start over. in order to progress as a better person in his future he needs to step away from the damage he’s done in the past because frankly, even if izuku were to forgive him there’s absolutely no way for this to be made alright. for either of them to forget about it. it would hang over them every time izuku flinches when he spots bakugo from his peripheral. it would hang over them.

the best thing they can do for themselves is learn who they are without the other person casting a very strange and complicated shadow. closure is important but sometimes it’s just that – closure. that part of your life ends and you move forward. and hopefully by that time, yeah, if they ever see each other in the future they can be amicable and just. chat about mundane things, and then continue moving on. the goal would be just. being able to breathe easier.

that’s the best that can really be hoped for. they just need some time away.

lmao if you reblog, do not tag this as bk/dk.