PLEASE, can I get the writing meme commentary for “The thing about being really rich is that it means I’m capable of things that no one else is. For instance: at any time, if I want to, I can kick Lex Luthor in the balls. […] The point is, from this point forward, Luthor is going to spend the rest of his life worried that I’m going to kick him in the balls and completely unable to do anything about it. That doesn’t work if I give my money away.”

unpretty:

this is the closest bruce wayne can possibly get to admitting he’s batman and when lois rereads this later and realizes what he did she’s gonna kick him in the balls

bruce would never actually kick lex in the balls when he could kick him in the head instead, but lex doesn’t know that and by making these statements publicly bruce has put lex luthor in the position of either having to avoid bruce at events, or else pointedly not avoiding bruce, but the thing is that lex is a coward and if bruce looks like he might kick him lex will abso-fucking-lutely flinch and because the article is public everyone will know exactly why he flinched and bruce won’t have to say a goddamn thing

they don’t even run into each other all that often but it’s just often enough that lex will never truly be free from the vague, nagging concern that this dude who famously enjoys shit like riding motorcycles off cliffs and kickboxing might decide on a whim to kick him and he wouldn’t even have to do it hard and lex has no options that won’t result in people making fun of him, aside from maybe wearing a reinforced cup at all times so any kicks won’t incapacitate him, but at that point he’s putting himself through a lot of discomfort just on the off-chance that a billionaire everyone likes more than him might kick him and he will always, always be putting a lot more thought into this than bruce ever will